"There's no combination of words I could put on the back of a postcard... No song I could sing... But I can try for your heart...Our dreams, and they are made out of real things... Like a, shoebox of photographs... With sepiatone loving... Love is the answer, At least for most of the questions in my heart... Like why are we here? And where do we go? And how come it's so hard? It's not always easy and... Sometimes life can be deceiving... I'll tell you one thing its always better when we're together..."
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Dirty Thirty...


Can I just tell you... how happy it makes me feel that my husband turns 30 way before I do!!  I'm so stuck on as what to do for this very special occasion.... typically I'm so full of ideas... it's hard just to chose one... but this one I'm struggling with..

Of course Justin tells me "not to make a big deal out of it" and "not to spend a fortune" ~but seriously... doesn't he know me better than that by now???  It's especially cool because Trevor Starr (one of Justin's older brothers will be flying in from Berkeley, CA just to celebrate with us, so this must be super fun, afterall we're trying on convince Trevor to move back to Arizona)

 It's a bit of challenge simply because we are going to be out of town in the near future which means I wont have much time to work on it... sooo... in the mean time my friends and family... SAVE the DATE:  Friday June 18th!!  Ideas... send them my way... my creative juices need some stimulating..

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Creative Pick Me Up?


Blah, I've been in a funk the past two days...  I need to feel inspired to get me going again...

~shopping? new make up?, new clothes?, maybe
~redesigning an area in my home?, perhaps too much of a chore?
~catching up in my blogging and photo editting?..,  ugg I usually love doing this, but I'm so behind
~working out?.., only if I can put new music on my ipod first
~traveling?.... I have to wait another couple weeks...
~planning a new event?... my sexy husband is turning 30 in less than a month...I need to get this going
~driving around and rockin to No Doubt?, always a winner!

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The "New Normal"

Losing a loved one, especially tragically certainly just derails your life completely.  When you are forced to deal with such unexpected big decisions to be made... you stop and realize.... I'm a grown up now.  My sweet husband and his two brothers are doing well.  Although I feel it's important for me to keep many details of the past 45 days private ~as a respect to my family... I did want to say again ..............

THANK YOU!  To everyone that showered us with love.....it was nearly overwhelming... so much that I've almost lost track of the individual wonderful things that people have done for our family. 

I'm currently working on getting my overdue thank you cards out.  I know how important it is to send thank yous, even though it seems so small of a gesture when thinking of some of the amazing things people did for us. 

I've learned more in the past 45 days then I have in the past 4 years... and I hope all the things I've learned will always stay with me.....and make me a better person.  

Much love to my blog readers, and stay tuned as I have a lot of catching up to do with my blogging.  Through this journey we have had some special, happy times, and it's important for me to blog about them and appreciate them.

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Dear Mom...


Dear Mom,
Happy Happy Birthday to you!  I woke up this morning feeling so happy and so grateful that I could pick up the phone~call you, and say happy birthday, say I love you, and say I'm so happy I get to see you tonight for dinner.

Can't wait to celebrate the amazing person you are. 

Love Your Daughter,
Jennifer


P.S. The photo above is your birthday present from me.  I bought a venue for you to run your floral business and for me to hold weddings and events at ~hope you like it:)

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Sailing Away....

I'm so thankful for my amazing parents.  This last month has been the hardest month of our lives... truly.  It's really weird how sadness can really weigh you down, making even normal day things such a difficult challenge.  But mom and dad researched and researched and finally ended up selecting a vacation for us five, Justin, Me, Mom, Dad, and Stinkerbell to go on. 

In a few weeks we will be going on a 7 day cruise to the Mexican Riviera!!!  Making stops in Puerto Vallarta, Mazatlan, and Cabo San Lucas!!  It will be mine and Justin's first time on a cruise.  It will be so wonderful just to escape and be together in the middle of the ocean.  Can't wait!

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And... Life Continues...?

What a weekend.  What had such a beautiful day celebrating such a beautiful life.  I feel so happy that we were able to create a day that was so perfect, so sweet, so Barbara.  I was so touched by our family and friends who attended, truly.......the gift of just simply "being there" is so meaningful and so powerful especially to the broken hearted.

In memory of Barbara Louise Starr


Barbara Louise Starr, daughter of Theodore and Ruth Conley, was born on March 26, 1951, in Newark Ohio. She passed away on April 9, 2010, at the age of 59.
The youngest of four daughters, Barbara had lots of blond hair and an impish smile. She loved making tents with blankets and chairs, outside or inside, she and her sister would hide away for hours. Her favorite time was Christmas when she and the other girls shared a five pound box of chocolates under the tree on Christmas Eve and a pile of presents on Christmas morning. When young she always wanted to do what her big sisters did, so she was the Brownie troop mascot before actually being a Brownie and always kept up with her pack of older sisters.


But by the time she became a teenager, she became fiercely independent and refused to follow anyone’s path. She was fun loving and popular, but also broke the mold for what a girl should do. She was dubbed “the beautiful blond behind the big bass drum” as she was the first girl to play that instrument for the Anthony Wayne High School Marching Generals Band. But Barbara had life interests beyond the bass drum; she also had a part time job at the Sunshine School, a residential facility for severely disabled children. It was there that she developed the kindness, patience, and skill needed to become a nurse.



She earned her Licensed Practical Nurse degree from the Nursing School of Bowling Green and went to work at Blanchard Valley Hospital in Findlay, Ohio. She worked there for a decade becoming highly respected for her medical and administrative skills as well as her careful and humane treatment of patients. During this time she married and had three sons, Shannon, Trevor and Justin, who became the center of her life.



For the past 15 years has she called Scottsdale, AZ home, where she enjoyed hikes in the desert and Sunday afternoons by the pool. She loved Italian food, wine spritzers, smooth jazz, and traveling, often in the company of her companion and partner-in-crime Mr. William Gaillard. In addition to enjoying the simple pleasures of life she also took great pride and joy in helping others, making a name for herself in the valley as an excellent, caring, and dedicated nurse. For years she worked at Phoenix Mountain Nursing Center as a floor nurse and eventually as a nurse manager, before moving to Arizona Hospice, where she continued her work with those in need until her untimely passing. One of her recent achievements of which she and her family were most proud was completion of an Associate of Science degree in nursing. A goal for which she spent countless nights studying at home and which allowed her to achieve her dream of becoming a Registered Nurse.


Without a doubt, the role she most relished was that of mother. She never failed to let her children know how much she loved them, and gave to them unceasingly. Sad to be away from them and overjoyed to be with them, the happiest times of her life were when all three of her boys and daughter-in-law Jennifer came together to be with her. Christmas by far was her favorite time of year, for it was her excuse to give without limit, to set out candies and cookies, to decorate, to wrap presents, and to cook. In short, to make her children feel as loved as anyone possibly could.


Her premature departure from this world deprives a great many people of her love and compassion, of her silliness and her smile, of her soothing voice and her reassuring embrace. She will be forever missed by those whom she touched, especially her children, who can never replace the love they have lost, but most definitely will honor it by following her example to be the best people and most loving parents they can be.

In addition to those mentioned above, her passing is mourned by her sister, Linda Hicks; sister and brother in law, Sheila and Bill Tompos; sister and brother in law, Carol and Tim Evans; nephew, David Daily, nephew and wife, Stephen and Lori Tompos; grand nieces, Laurel, Stephenie, and Lily Ann Tompos; and all her many friends and colleagues.

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I don't like feeling sad....



I'm so hesitant to blog...... it just seems so.... surface to me right now and my feelings are so personal... I'm sad that I never had the opportunity to throw my amazing mom in-law a wonderful celebration when she was alive..... I just feel as if no matter how much heart I put into her special day this Saturday, it just can never be enough to honor her.... I so wished I would have asked her a million more questions~

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I'm quite convinced....

Doggies help the heart to heal....everyone should have a dog, or two.

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